Some Teachers Engage in Bullying Behavior
This is sad but true. I have watched teacher purposely, humiliate, emasculate and denigrate students. I do not deny that there are students that constantly test, rebel, defy and even harass teachers and bully other students. Some students even bully other teachers as well as assault them. I have always thought that excess of aggression comes from a place of fear and insecurity. Then there are the gifted students who challenge students because they are hyper-intelligent. When in a room full of different personalities, many vying for your attention, some dealing with difficulties and home, some whose attitude derives from anxiety about their abilities, how does a teacher cope?
Communication
The general consensus is 93% of communication is nonverbal (body language and tone respectively). Your thoughts and feelings are reflected in your face and tone of voice. I endeavor to mind my tone of voice, facial expression and body language. I have had to square off with students bigger and taller than me. When I do, my body language is quietly confident and my tone is firm and calm. I choose my words carefully. I do not try to hide my annoyance from my students. I communicate my frustration, but I do it respectfully. I let them know I am human and I have bad days too. I let them know when I am having a bad day and I do not want to be messed with. This can only happen after developing a rapport and relationship with your students that is based on mutual respect and trust.
Modeling the Behavior You Want to See
As I reflected upon what kind of teacher I wanted to be, I realized it was in direct correlation to what kind of person I am. I am firstly, a Christian and the Bible is my guide and rule for behavior and attitude towards life and others. Interestingly, I have had students tell me they know I am a Christian. I am glad that I am able to communicate my beliefs without saying a word. I thank God that His light shines through me in spite of myself. I endeavor to be cordial, polite, respectful and under no circumstances do I want to strip a student of his or her dignity.
One of my former student's mother gave me a greeting card at the end of the year. She said that she could tell I was a Christian. She also talked about how they had a family meeting and how her and her husband talked to their teenage daughter about the importance of respecting authority. Her daughter said how it was so easy to respect me, because I show her and her peers respect. Therein lies the key -- do you want respect from your students?! Show them respect. That is not to say that we are equals -- I am an adult and teacher and they are minors and students. However, they deserve age appropriate respect. I let my students know that I expect them to act their age.
Age Appropriate Treatment and Expectations
I do not treat middle and high schoolers like kindergartners. I remember seeing a teacher having a male middle school sit on the floor as a form of a time out. I would not do that to a adolescent boy -- I think it is humiliating and emasculating. Teachers need make sure that students maintain their dignity even in the face of dealing with the consequences of the actions. I have high expectations of my students. I expect them to be the best they can be. When I mete out consequences, I do it calmly and respectfully. I rarely raise my voice at students and I do not speak disparagingly to them. When I do raise my voice, it is startling and shocking to them because it is so rare. As one administrator told me, "keep that in your back pocket."
Maintaining Control
Finally, I do not seek to be control of the students. I seek to be in control of myself -- and I give them choices to make. I do not vacillate with it comes to consequences. Inconsistency cause students to not take a teacher seriously. I seek to make the students accountable. For example, if a student has to leave the room, I have a sign out sheet. I have communicated the need for accountability without saying a word. As a substitute teacher, the students know that I am going to leave the sign out sheet for the teacher. So, students that take advantage will be addressed by the teacher as well.
In mixed ability classrooms, some students may have to go to the counselor, or a specialist. In that case, you can create a sheet that says where they are going and have them sign in upon returning to the classroom. I also have a shining star list. That is for students that were on task, following the classroom rules, and were helpful in some way. I make sure I use the existing reward system to encourage the students. I am big on positive reinforcement. At the end of the day, my goal is to have a pleasant and productive day at school. While there are tedious moments during the day (it is a part of life) learning should also be fun and adventurous!
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